Friday, January 14, 2011

Craftsman Heavenly Hefe

Type: Unfiltered Bavarian Wheat Hefeweisen
Origin: Pasadena, CA
Price: $16 pitcher at Blind Lady Ale House
I don't care % ABV

Okay, after writing a very harsh review on Craftsman's Spring Braggot Ale, whereby I was a complete asshole, I decided to try a simpler brew from these guys and give them a second chance to redeem themselves. EPIC FAIL AGAIN!!

I don't understand why so many people are slobbing this breweries knob. Honestly, have you people ever tasted a half decent hefeweisen before? The beer looks just as it should, and smells just as it should, middle of the road hefe on the Caucasian side of life with banana and hints of clove. A decent pour as well. But does that even fucking matter? NO.

What matters is how this shit for a hefe tastes when i shove it down my throat. When it's in contact with my sexy and perfect tongue, you taste the banana with the spiciness of cloves and obviously, wheat. Just as it should in normal fashion, nothing fancy. But for fucks sake people, after swallowing there is no finish to speak of. NONE. ZERO. ZILCH. Its as if I just swallowed water. This could be spun to have a single benefit, easy drinking session brew. Oh wait, I still want my beer to have a finish, probably the most important defining factor that determines whether a beer is good or not.

No wonder why Simon is such a prick. Alright let me stop being an asshole again. If this beer had a nice lingering aftertaste, it would be pretty delicious, and very refreshing. But it doesn't, so I won't be drinking it anytime soon. Maybe it was an old tap? I don't care anymore.

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