Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Magic Hat Brewery

This doesn't capture how batshit wacky the place is inside.
5 Bartlett Bay Road
South Burlington, VT 05403
(802) 658-2739

A few months back we had open house for graduate student recruiting, and I had the thorough pleasure of meeting some mouthbreathing fuckwit from Vermont.  After mentioning I would be in the region in the near future, I inquired about breweries to visit, or at least try.  (I've been to Magic Hat a while back, but this was before I really gave a shit about beer.)  Of course he scoffed, rubbed his pubic-hair looking shitty beard, and rolled his eyes at the mention of Magic Hat; I knew we were dealing with not only a mouthbreathing fuckwit, but also a beer snob.  As you might imagine, he started naming off brewery after brewery which, after visiting the area, turned out to be the equivalent of naming off Hess* to a non-Whale's Vagina-ian who really just wants to try Alesmith or Lightning.

Having been here before, I knew what to expect: Tasty brew, wacky knick-knacks, a free tour, and free tastings.  Yes please.  The beer can range from ho-hum (Demo - review coming), to odd-but-tasty (Pistil), to damn good (Humdinger imperial pilsner - review coming).  And although it was odd that I couldn't buy a few more tastings even if I wanted to, I still managed to scam a few extra (in the name of science of course!).  The tour is fun, but at one point they show a montage with pictures that looked like they were off a camera phone with a 0.1 megapixel camera--and of course it was projected onto a wall.  But overall this is a nice way to kill a few hours in South Burlington, Vermont.  So fuck that mouthbreather!  Go have fun here, and drink some good, free beer; and buy some wacky shit; and bring home a growler if you must.  But never pretend like pubic hair on your face is a beard.  Then you'll be like that asshole from Vermont.

* A note about Hess:  No offense intended.  I simply mean it's a small-as-fuck operation and only San Diegan beer drinkers would know of it, and even fewer would have tried their beers.

No comments:

Post a Comment