Friday, August 24, 2012

Beers in Down Under: Sorely Lacking...

Oh Australia, with your reputation for drunken violence, hot babes, expensive everything, beautiful beaches, aboriginals, and stupid animals. I was lucky enough to be afforded a free trip down under, and I made the most of it beer wise. I found the country sorely lacking in good commercially available beer. But this is no fault of the people, rather the excessively tax happy government that makes it virtually impossible for craft breweries to exist. But lets just see what it is people here like to drink.

Being drunk
The answer? Who gives a shit, because clearly Aussies don't. Every beer tastes exactly the fucking same. Whether it's a lager, or an ale, its pretty hard to differentiate which is which. And in the end, I stopped caring too. There are definitely quality breweries around, but it requires serious effort to get their beer, and usually entails making a trip out to the brewery itself if you are fortunate enough to be near one. I didn't have the luxury to seek them out, so I had to rely on bars and liquor shops. In the end, the options, even those from "craft" breweries, were all the same exact style, and the same exact flavor profile. Light, easy drinking, crisp, fizzy yellow beer. The good news is... you still get drunk. My favorite beer of the trip... Paulaner. No comparison.

Best beer in Australia. Note: not Australian.

Take home message? Don't go to Australia for beer. Even worse, if you love wine, which I most certainly do, it costs almost twice as much for an Aussie produced bottle in the damn country as it does back home in good 'ole San Diego. At least they had other things to offer. Besides boobs, my personal favorite is kangaroo scrotum bottle openers. Enjoy.

PS: Fun fact, you can't find Foster's anywhere down under, seems to be only exported. Oh, and a 6 pack of Heineken is $18. A 24 pack of MGD? $45.

1 comment:

  1. reminds me of this: